Rob shares his deepest and most revealing process to date! Rob lays out a map of his own internal landscape to walk us through the entire Emotional Scale, finding the buried treasure of hurts and pains that lead him to unprecedented Freedom within.
The material is spoken in the videos and also presented as text below the videos.
Part 2
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Anatomy of Freedom
We start at the very bottom of the emotional scale and work our way to the top. You will notice this natural progression unfold the farther we go. The more you feel each step, or feel your version of each step, the more you will emotionally move and benefit.
Please refer to the description and the “Emotional Scale Chart” at the end of the exercise for more information.
Bottom of Scale: Feeling unlovable
Top of Scale: I feel the love of God inside and easily smile to myself in the knowing of it.
- Most people feel unworthy of love in one way or another despite outer appearance – I am not the only one.
- Why do I think everyone else is worthy of love and it’s me who is at the mercy of their whims to love me or not?
- My own needs, desires and preferences are not important. In fact, I don’t dare bring them up for fear of pushing “love” away. I’ll just change and be what you want me to be and then you’ll stay.
- I’ll take whoever shows up—just give me a few crumbs of love and I’ll live with it and forsake myself in the process.
- I don’t really have anything to contribute so I’ll stick to what I have and try to not make you miserable in the process. I’ll try to not suck you dry from my neediness and unworthiness.
- When you have other interests I don’t like it because I am afraid I will loose your to those other more valuable things.
- How can you value me when I don’t value myself?
- How dare you have a life of your own. You are supposed to give me all of your attention. This relationship is supposed to be about us, not you!
- Asshole! Selfish Bitch! Stone Cold, Emotionless Piece of Shit!
- You should really open up and feel more like me. I know that’s why you are so unhappy—you are just afraid to feel!
- Maybe I can pretend to not want you so much and then you’ll miss me and come around.
- This relationship sucks because you are shut down, uncaring and heartless.
- You have mom and dad issues you need to deal with and you’re too afraid to face it. See all the work and pain I go through for my own healing?
- I’m going to close my heart to you until you open yours!
- Ok, that didn’t last long—I’m in pain again and I hate you for it!
- I hate that I can’t figure our how to make this work. There must me some way I will figure out to make you love me more!
- I HATE THAT I HAVE NO CONTROL OVER YOU!
- If I can’t figure it out I am lost—you are everything to me.
- Fuck! I am so lonely! My heart hurts so bad!
- God dammit! How do I get out of this! I don’t see any way out. I am trapped.
- I hate you for doing this to me! I hate you! I hate you and I want to fucking hurt you like you are hurting me!
- God I hurt so much. I am so alone. Why is life this way?
- It’s just beyond me to figure out. My head is spinning with torturous thoughts and I think I am going crazy!
- All I can feel is the pain.
- It’s my pain and I had it before meeting you. I’ve had it for as long as I can remember.
- I have always felt an emptiness inside.
- I have created many ways to try and not feel it. You are just the latest distraction so I blame you. Its not your fault or responsibility.
- I am sorry I put this on you. This is all about me.
- I am missing something inside. I don’t believe in myself. I am unworthy.
- God…can you please help me? I feel alone and lost. Will you just hold me? I am so tired…so tired and worn out from chasing love and running from my fears. Please just hold me. I need to rest… I give up…I surrender…I need help… I can’t keep doing the same thing over and over and get something different.
- Will you help me?
- Thank you for listening to everything I just spewed out. You are so patient, so understanding. The more I share the warmer you feel to me—the closer I feel to you.
- How do you do that? How do you love me when I am at my worst?
- How do you not turn in disgust when I show you who I am?
- I guess I am not a bad person. Everyone hurts right?
- Thank you for letting me get that load off God. I think I feel a little better and a little clearer.
- I can feel more of you in me. When I let go of trying to keep it together you seem to be there ready to support me.
- What if I could stop trying to “keep it together” more often? Would you always be there?
- I think you would be…
- I think you are always here waiting for me to drop my guard and open up. As I feel your warmth I can feel the truth of your constant attention to me. It is me who takes my attention from you.
- If I could keep my attention on you, maybe I would not feel so lonely. I don’t feel lonely right now. In fact, I feel pretty good. How do you do that?
- This feels better than the love I was trying to get from the other person. It’s trustable—it’s soothing—made just for me.
- If I can have this why would I make myself a beggar for something else? My God, that seems so crazy right now! Why was I doing that?
- I have all I need right here inside of me.
- How could I make someone else responsible for this feeling, this connection? Make them responsible for something they cannot ever give me?
- No one else can truly give me this peace. No one else can truly give me this calm, this well being, this flow of truth and love and knowing that is filling my body.
- There is nothing missing inside—here with myself. So simple, so plain, so at ease.
- This is my value, my true worth. It has been here all along. Is this not worthy to contribute to the world?
- How can I take this worthiness, this quiet, humble connection into the world? It is sure to be wanted because it appears to be a rare commodity. Look at all the starving people, myself included, beating each other up for a resource that is completely within our grasp…completely within us…no shortage in sight.
- This is where I want to live. This is Home.
- I feel so lucky to have found this Love…this missing part of me.
- From this vantage point, it is totally ok if you don’t love me. In fact, I no longer need to be with anyone for Love. I want to be with someone because it’s fun, because we share, we laugh, sometimes cry, we explore, discover, adventure, experiment, experience, cook, clean, throw soapsuds and dish rags at each other. We touch, we kiss, we open ourselves fully because we trust ourselves that much. We put trust in the knowing of our own Love, not the expectation of perfection in the other.
- Is this what Freedom is? It is not what I thought…it’s better!
- This is the Freedom I don’t have to defend. This is the Freedom to be me. To know me, to value me, to care for me, to trust me.
- There is nothing more precious for me to nurture than this Love and connection I have inside.
- I feel the Love of God and easily smile to myself in the knowing of it.
- I have been loveable all along…
Reflections
Did you feel the progression up the scale?
Did you feel an increase of relief along the way or at some point?
Did you hear/feel your own guidance at any point?
For further clarity, read through again as if you were reading it to yourself, about yourself. What did you learn about yourself?
Exercise Description
This exercise is based on working the “Emotional Scale” as outlined by Abraham-Hicks. We start at whatever level we are at and, step by step like climbing a ladder, we work our way up to higher states of connection and clarity. This can be a more effective way of changing how we feel rather than trying to reach for a high level affirmation we cannot feel or believe in.
This process helps us to become aware of the thoughts we are thinking that normally go unchallenged and have their way with us. When we become aware, we can see that the negative thoughts are false and they loose their “charge” and their power over us. The way is then cleared for thoughts to arise that are more accurate and can support us if we feel them and let them in. You will see this natural progression happen in the exercise.
It is important to breathe and feel each step along the way. Take your time. Rather than resisting some feelings and opening to others, the goal is to open to all our feelings. This opening allows the negative feelings to be released from our bodies and the positive or “accurate” feelings to be felt and experienced. It is pleasurable to feel all of our feelings. The pain we associate with some feelings comes when we avoid and resist them.
Make Your Own
The greatest impact is gained by making your own. There are 2 ways to use this scale. You can start at any level you find yourself and begin moving up from there, or, you can start at the bottom to clear out some root negative emotions.
Be completely honest and non-judgmental with yourself. Relax. No one has to see this but you. Let go of holding on to what you think you “should” think and feel and write what you really do think and feel, no matter how dark.
Truth attracts more truth. Denial attracts more denial.
The things we own, can no longer own us. That is how we awaken.
Reach for a real thought that strikes a cord in your body and write it down. (I have found it to be more effective to write with my own handwriting instead of using a computer or doing it my your head.) As you feel that thought, stay open for the next thought that strikes a cord. Don’t rush the process. It can take several minutes find the next impactful thought. The more you insist upon only using the thoughts that strike a cord, the more enlightening this exercise will be and the more you will train yourself to listen to your heart and your gut. Keep going until you feel the relief and freedom from the connection that happens at the top.
The Emotional Scale
From the book “Ask and It is Given”, pg. 114
- Joy/Appreciation/Empowered/Freedom/Love
- Passion
- Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness
- Positive Expectation/Belief
- Optimism
- Hopefulness
- Contentment
- Boredom
- Pessimism
- Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
- Overwhelment
- Disappointment
- Doubt
- Worry
- Blame
- Discouragement
- Anger
- Revenge
- Hatred/Rage
- Jealousy
- Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
- Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness
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